Beauty on Strings

Beauty Beyond Words, Me want one :)

& The Hits Just Keep On Coming

I am SO Fucking IMPRESSED

Today was sitting at work feeling physically and psychologically tired and drained so I though I open the GTalk to pass the time and have the day end quickly *Yes, I know that it is the beginning of the week and the weekend is just over, so save the comments*

I found my sister on line and since I moved out of the house our relationship got so much better. I guess the friction of being so close and living together day in day out, plus being so different changed since I moved out and become just a weekly visitor. I guess the saying is indeed true, be away for a while & you will be missed more.

Anyhow so when I saw my sister on line on GTalk I figured its a good chance to talk to her and catch up.

So, we chatted for a while and then all of a sudden she was silent I kept on talking to be answered by an Arabic reply that "Mum is on the phone and I want to talk to you Auntie"

I was so fucking impressed and assotnished, my 7 year old nephew knows how to write in Arabic not to mention chat. He is 7 for God's sake!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I could not believe it at first and I am still shaking my head in amazement, back when I was 7 years old all I could do was play with cars and soldiers and have two imaginary Friends called Hassan and Mamdouh whom I used to invite to tea and talk to them.

Here is bits and pieces of the conversation:

myehia2001: خالتو ماما بتتكلم في التليفون انا سيف ممكن تكلمي عربي؟ "Auntie, mum is on the phone I am Saif, can you speak in Arabic?"

Me: انت بتتكلم بجد "Are you for real?"

myehia2001: ايوه "Yes"
Me: انت عرفت تكلم كدة منين؟ "How did you learn to do that?"

myehia2001: من المدرسة ده حاجة سهلة خالص اصل ماما ركبتلي الأنترنت من شوية بس بطئ فمش عارف ألعب لعب مع اصحابي علي النت ممكن نقوليلها تركب واحد اسرع شوية؟ "From School its a very easy thing, since mum installed the Internet, I noticed that it is kind of slow so I can not play network games with my friends, Can you tell her to install something faster?"
Me: ماشي يا سيدي :) "Okie Sir :)"

myehia2001: خالتو انا عايز اجيلك عند عمو شامل انت وحشني اوي والله "Auntie, Can I come visit you @ Uncle Shamel's, I really miss you so much?"
Me: طيب قول لماما تجيبك وتعالي اي وقت يا حبيبي "Sure thing dear, tell your mum and let her come and get you with her any time."

myehia2001: ماشي بس ممكن اطلب طلب يا خالتو؟ "Okie, can I ask for another request from you Auntie?"
Me: ممكن طبعاً "Sure go ahead."

myehia2001: ممكن تجبيلي الفلاشة بتعتيك العشرة جيجا عشان اجيب لعب من عند صاحبي؟ "Can you bring me your 10GB flash memory to get some games from a friend?"
Me: ممكن طبعاً هجبهالك السبت الجاي "Sure thing, will bring it next Friday."

myehia2001: وعد يا خالتو؟"Promise Auntie?"
Me: وعد يا حبيبي "Promise dear"

That's only an introduction to what lasted to be a three hours conversation with the nephew. I still could not believe myself till this very moment. A 7 year old who wants a higher bandwidth for the Internet to play network games and a 10GB flash memory to get new games. What is that? Things has changed that much? Did I grow that old to have the phrase back when I was a kid?

But, it has to be said, I am extremely proud with that kid and can not wait to tell it to the world. I have never had this motherly feeling of him and been proud that way. Yes it may sound like a trivial thing for others but its a BIG DEAL FOR ME.

Saifo, I am so proud of you kid. May you grow to be a a good, well educated successful young Man Ya Rab

From Within

When the world has turned its back

When the days have turned pitch black

When the fear abducts your tongue

When the fire's dead and gone

So what now? Where do I head?

When you think it's all said and done

When you are the ostracized

Selfish ridden dead goodbyes

Twisting of the tourniquet

When the pieces never fit

So what now?

Where go I?When you think it's all said and done

Bow down

Sell your soul to meI will set you free

Pacify your demons

Bow down

Surrender unto me

Submit infectiously

Sanctify your demonsInto abyss

You don't exist

Cannot resistThe Judas kiss

When the storm has blacked your sky

Intuition crucifyWhen the ego strips your reign

Assasinate the living flameSo what now?

Where do I head?

When you think it's all said and done

Venom of a life insane

Bites into your fragile veinInternalize and decimate

Patronize and complicate

So what now?

Where do I head?

When you think it's all said and doneBow down

Sell your soul to meI will set you free

Pacify your demons

Bow downSurrender unto me

Submit infectiously

Sanctify your demonsInto abyss

You don't existCannot resist

The Judas kiss

Judas lives recite this vow

I've become your new God now

Followed you from dawn of time

Whispered thoughts into your mind

Watched your towers hit the ground

Lured your children never found

Helped your kings abuse their crown

In the heart of feeble man

Plant the seeds of my own plan

The strong and powerful will fall

Find a piece of me in allInside you all

So bow down

Sell your soul to meI will set you free

Pacify your demons

Bow down

Surrender unto me

Submit infectiously

Sanctify your demonsInto abyss

You don't exist

Cannot resistThe Judas kiss

Thank You

Been having hard times due to some crisis that are talking place in different aspects of my life that made me unable of dealing with anything. I had this Zombie like attitude, that made me lay on the coach like this energy less puppet that is wondering in LaLa Land.

However, yesterday was not feeling like working and so I spent the day wondering through my favourite blogs. With pure luck was checking Insomniac's Blog and stumbled across this old post that made everything clear.

It just hit me like a thunder storm, I should enjoy the little things and stop expecting everything in life to go clock work perfect cause it simply never will. What I will do is mess out on the real and small happy things in my life. You know the little real things that make you appreciate being here, that gives you the reason to get out of bed in the morning and go on. I have had this time in my life when I had nothing to look forward to and trust me it almost ended with suicide that is how ugly it was. Not to mention that I almost ruined the one thing I enjoy the most which is being in my home with the hubby, my anchor, my safe place.

So, Thank You Insomniac, your post helped me a lot and you probably saved me from ruining my life without knowing.

Keep inspiring Girl.

& So Once again on the chair of judged I sit, having no hope and never feeling Fit

Yes, but I have Killer Legs

As previously discussed I have been handling distributing memos regarding dress codes in my new job as per the meeting where the shoe incident took place. One of the concerns discussed during the meeting was inappropriate skirts AKA TOO REVEALING outfits. We have informed yesterday our female employees that skirts should be at knee length or longer to keep a professional working environment bottom line to keep the male focus focused on the job at hand not the legs going around all day. That being said, here is a conversation that took place this morning after noticing that a certain person is wearing a skirt that is 30 cm long while she is standing up do not have a clue nor the imagination what the situation would be like when she sits down, let's just call her Employee X

Me: Good morning.

Employee X: Good Morning.

Me: Didn't you get the memo regarding the dress code yesterday?

Employee X: Yes I did.

Me: Okie, but this skirt clearly is not abiding to these standards.

Employee X looking at her skirt and looking back at me innocently.

Employee X: What do you mean?

Me: I mean it is too short..

Employee X: Is it?

Me: Yes..

Employee X: I thought I could still wear it.

Me: Why is that? It is clearly not according to the dress code.

Employee X: Yes, but it makes my legs look good.

Me: Excuse me?

Employee X: I thought I could wear it cause it makes my legs look good and it is good for the job and all being a receptionist. I thought I could wear it if it makes my job easier

Me: "Too shocked to respond took a second and looked back at her": Look X, your job is not to show legs whether they look good or not, your job is being professional and treat guests in a professional and respectable manner. It has nothing to do with showing legs.

Employee X: But, wouldn't that be easier with me having a killer legs.

NO COMMENT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

At this point, I lost hope in talking sense to her and informed her that even if her legs look good or not she has to abide to the dress code. I can not believe how people think sometimes. The things we see @ work.

Is That Your Toe Sticking Out of Your Shoe?

Had a very embarrassing situation at work. Was sitting in my very first Admin meeting where I get to be introduced to the different managers of different departments. So, I was kind of concentrating on faces and names to try to figure out who does what.

Anyhow, the meeting went well and I thought I left a good impression. Until one SOB from the attendees looked at me while I am sitting my usual sit with crossed legs and discussing dress code and how a memo should be circulated to let the employees know what to wear and not to wear at work and whether or not we should allow beach kind of flip flops at work . Which he interrupted me all of a sudden and looked at my feet and asked "innocently":

"Hey Speaking of shoes, is that your toe sticking out of your shoe?"

To find all of sudden the entire meeting attendees starring at my feet evidently the shoe got torn without me noticing but the ass did not have to comment about it, not to mention why the fuck is he looking at my shoe. I Froze for a second and smiled this yellow smile and said "Yes, I am starting a new trend, but I think my feet is not the concern of this meeting" Everyone laughed and the meeting went on but that did not stop me from feeling like I want to tore his freaking nick with my teeth.

The Ass, it seems there are a lot of those around. No Fucking Comment.

Unknowingly Why

It is weird how we sometimes like things without any apparent reason, since forever I have had a thing for Snow Globes. You know the glass balls thingies that usually have a city and when you shake it snow or little glitters flow inside it. I used to have quiet a big collection of it, certain character or famous places. Never understood why but when I shake it and see the little objects or gliters fall down always manage to calm me down, give me a sense of inner peace. Weird may be.

Another unexplainable thing is Sand Hours, I have a very big thing for them. Last time I went to my parent's house to find out that my nephew bought one I wanted to take it from him but he went the extra mile and bought me one to save his new toy to be confiscated by the Gustavo that it is anyone who misses with Saif's toys.

It always gave me a weird feeling watching sand seeping from the upper part to the lower part, it somehow reminded me of how short life is and how we should cease the moment cause simply our life and time here could end anytime. Our life span is slowly and steadily coming to an end so slowly to the point that we do not feel it and take it for granted sometimes, as if we are going to stay here for good. As if death visits other people and not us, the famous rule of "It only happens to others but not me" It is a good reminder to appreciate things and always tell people around you how you feel cause simply you might not see them again. Appreciate them cause you might loose them so suddenly. This is not pessimism it is simply beaing realistic. It is something that helped me understand the very Essence of life which is temporarily iness.

Last but definitely not least, Newton Pendulum you might not know the name but you have definitely seen them before in movies usually in psychiatrists offices or with people who the director wants to emphasis thar they have a deep character, not that I do but they always fascinates me. They help me take decisions I get lost in my thoughts looking at them and seeing the silver ball hitting the other and the other hit the other and so on and so on, showing you the for every action there is a single and equal reaction and for every decision we take in life there are consequences, things that happen just cause we have said this or we have done that, even the decision of buying a pack of smokes from a certain place and not from another one.

No, I am not pro thinking too much on the contrary I am one of the persons who believes that let the dice roll and whatever is destined for you, you would have. Call it gezmit, fate, or faith in a higher power.

It does not mean that we simply do not have a choice but God just knows how our minds work in certain situations and how each and every one of us will act when faced with something.

Call me weird but these are my favourite things in life, if at some point you want to get me something this is your thing. "Greedy me grins". Seriously these things have affected major thoughts and decisions in my life, and made me believe that Life is what we make of it.

Excuse Me, Can You Please Explain The Glares?

Okie, as previously said I have Got a new job and being a smoker and all the first thing after asking about the Loo was ask if this is a smoking facility and was answered that it is not. Been following the smokers' foot steps to know what do they do throughout the working day and found out that they smoke downstairs.

Today being head achy and have a sour shoulder was not exactly in the mood so I went downstairs for a smoke hoping it would clear my mind and get it off things. I found a bunch of colleagues smoking there and so I lit my cigarette and inhaled the enjoyable smoke to look up and found a bunch of starring eyes looking at me like I was standing on my head in the middle of the street I looked away hoping they would resume their talk. To look again in seconds to find them still glaring and the loud conversation they were having turned into whispers which got me thinking they were talking about me like I was doing something illegal or unethical I was just smoking for God's sake same as them.

So instead of looking away I glared back at them and only then they looked away. I was like "WTF????"

Never understood where they are coming from? Can someone Please explain it to me?